don't tell me the truth about love

he says he loves her but loves me more
he says he believes she will leave him, he can't dump her.
it is painful;
he hopes I understand
he wants me to wait for the transition.
soon, real soon
coz I love you, he says, a whole lot!
he turns off the phone when I call, and says
'baby, she is in the room, i will call you back later'
when i fret he says
'baby, understand i dont want her to scream. its not comfortable.'
then i tell him i am quitting, he cant choose
he says ,' if you leave i will die. '
when we are together and she calls,
he comfortably coos into the mouth piece
like i am invisible.'
smiles and says 'baby, it was her, she wants me home soon.'
and i should understand that.
when i pout,
i am most loved.
when she pouts, its an emergency case.
he buys her pearls and diamonds;
remembers me and gets the same, a little cheaper though.
After he convinces me he will marry me,
he tells me she is talking about an engagement party.
and he still can't choose.not yet.
let thinkgs work out baby, you know I Care about you.
but
he cant hurt her,
he wont 'hurt' me either
and I sit here, roses in hand- thorn pricked bloody
mingled with angry tears...
insanity, my next step
while I ask 'he loves me? he loves me not?'